The Male Loneliness Epidemic at Work: What HR Leaders Need to Know

Men, Loneliness, and the Workplace: An HR Guide to Building Connection 

Men make up nearly half the workforce, yet they remain largely invisible when it comes to one of the more pressing well-being challenges of our time: social isolation.

In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General’s declared social disconnection a public health epidemic, one affecting Americans across every demographic. He also made clear that the consequences of disconnection reach directly into the workplace. 

Lonely employees miss more work, perform below their capacity, and are more likely to leave. The financial toll is significant.

  “In the U.S., stress-related absenteeism attributed to loneliness costs employers an estimated $154 billion annually.” ~ U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation 

For HR professionals, the challenge is that male employees experiencing loneliness rarely flag it. The social patterns that contribute to isolation in men make this a problem that requires HR to go looking for it rather than wait for it to surface. 

• Research shows men’s close friendship networks have declined sharply since 1990, with workplace isolation carrying measurable costs for employers.
• Male employees are more likely than women to leave a job due to feeling disconnected from coworkers.
• The U.S Surgeon General’s advisory offers a clear framework of six recommendations that employers can act on.
• Ulliance EAP Services provide confidential support for employees navigating loneliness, disconnection, and the stress that accompanies both.

A Quiet Crisis: Understanding Male Loneliness

When the U.S. Surgeon General released the 2023 advisory on loneliness and social isolation, it landed with unusual force. The advisory described a public health epidemic affecting Americans across age, income, and geography, one that raises the risk of:

• Cardiovascular disease 
• Dementia 
• Depression
• Premature death

It also named the workplace directly as both a site where disconnection takes hold and a place with genuine potential to reverse it.

The Friendship Recession Hits Men Hardest

Research from the Survey Center on American Life found that 30 years ago, a majority of men (55%), reported having at least six close friends. Today, only 27% percent can say the same. 

The data at the other end of the spectrum are equally striking. In 1990, just 3% of men reported having no close friends at all. Today that figure stands at 15%, a fivefold increase. (Women have experienced a friendship decline too, but it has been considerably less steep.)

None of this happens in isolation from the workplace. 

The same research found that the workplace is now the most common place Americans make close friends, with more than half of Americans reporting they met at least one close friend at work. That makes the workplace both a reflection of the loneliness problem and one of the few remaining structures through which men might build meaningful connections. 

Why Men Are Less Likely to Name What They're Feeling

The cultural norms that shape male socialization (stoicism, self-reliance, a reluctance to disclose vulnerability) create a pattern where men experiencing isolation tend to internalize rather than articulate what is happening to them. 

Research consistently shows that men are less likely than women to rely on friends for personal support and less likely to reach out to a mental health professional. In a workplace context, they may withdraw, which often looks like disengagement, reduced participation, or flat performance, none of which obviously points to loneliness as the cause.

For HR leaders, this gap between what men experience and what they express is precisely why a proactive approach matters. Waiting for employees to raise the issue means waiting for something that, for many men, will never come.

What Workplace Loneliness Looks Like for Men

According to Gallup’s 2024 State of the Global Workplace report, one in five employees worldwide reports experiencing loneliness. 

Men and women report equal rates, each at 20%. The issue is not that men are lonelier at work than their colleagues. It is that when they are lonely, they manage it differently, and the way they handle it tends to be invisible until it becomes expensive.

When men Disengage Rather Than Disclose

The significant pattern for HR is what happens after loneliness sets in. Men tend not to name it. Instead, they disengage.

That disengagement has a direct retention cost. Research suggests that men are more likely than women to have left a job specifically because they felt disconnected from coworkers. 

But the behavioral signals that come before a departure tend to be quiet. Shorter responses in meetings. Less participation in informal conversations. A gradual pull toward transactional interactions and away from anything resembling personal connection. None of it announces itself as a well-being concern, which is exactly why it goes unaddressed until an employee is already on their way out.

6 Ways HR Can Build a More Connected Workplace

The persistence of workplace loneliness is more than a personal problem; it is an organizational one. In their study of 1,000 U.S. knowledge workers published in Harvard Business Review, organizational psychologists Constance Noonan Hadley and Sarah L. Wright found that loneliness is not primarily a personal problem but an organizational one, shaped far more by the work environment than by individual personality. Context shapes connection far more than individual personality does.

That finding reframes the HR role. Loneliness is not something employees bring with them and carry alone. It is something the workplace either reduces or compounds.

Here are 6 specific actions employers can taken, drawn from the Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community:

1. Make Social Connection a Strategic Priority

Loneliness carries a measurable business cost, and organizations that treat it as a strategic concern rather than a personal one are better positioned to address it. That means building connection into workforce planning, giving it dedicated resources, and holding leaders accountable for it alongside other organizational health metrics.

For many HR teams, this is the hardest shift. Connection does not have an obvious line on a budget or a dashboard. But the cost of loneliness-related absenteeism, cited in the Surgeon General’s advisory, makes a straightforward case for why it deserves one.

2. Train, Resource, and Empower Leaders to Promote Connection

Managers are the highest-leverage intervention point available to HR. Hadley and Wright's research identifies leadership behavior, along with the availability of social opportunities, as among the strongest drivers of whether employees feel connected or isolated at work. 

Training managers to recognize the behavioral signals of disconnection, and to take active steps to facilitate connection rather than wait for it to emerge naturally, is one of the most direct investments an organization can make.

A manager who asks, "How are things going with the team?" in a one-on-one meeting creates a different opening than one who asks only about project status. That is a training issue, not a culture transformation.

3. Educate Everyone About the Value of Social Connection

Awareness shapes behavior. Employees who understand why connection affects performance, retention, and well-being are better positioned to invest in it themselves and to support colleagues who are struggling. This does not require a formal program. It requires consistent, credible communication from leadership that social connection is taken seriously and that reaching out for support is encouraged rather than stigmatized.

For male employees in particular, that message rarely lands without deliberate repetition.

4. Create Practices and a Culture That Promote Connection, Inclusion, and Belonging

Corporate culture is built through repeated small actions, not declarations. This means examining how teams are structured, how meetings are run, and how informal interaction is treated in the daily rhythm of work.

Simply placing employees on teams does not reduce loneliness. When team membership creates an expectation of closeness that the team’s actual culture does not deliver, isolation can feel worse. What reduces loneliness is genuine interdependence, mutual respect, and social opportunities built into the work itself rather than bolted on afterward. 

That means:

• Scheduling social time as a legitimate part of the workday, not as an optional add-on
• Building slack into workflows so that informal conversation has room to happen
• Designing team structures that cultivate genuine interdependence rather than simply assigning people to groups

5. Implement Policies That Protect Time For Relationships Outside Work

Overworked employees have little energy or time left for the social life they need to sustain them. When workload expectations, meeting culture, and after-hours norms leave employees with no time or energy for relationships beyond the job, loneliness compounds regardless of what happens during work hours.

This recommendation asks HR to look at policy as a well-being tool. Reasonable workload expectations, protected personal time, and a culture that does not implicitly penalize employees for maintaining a life outside work are all relevant here.

6. Address the Opportunities and Challenges of Flexible and Remote Work

Flexibility serves employees in genuine ways. It also creates conditions where isolation can quietly take hold.

Hadley and Wright’s research adds important nuance: whether someone works five days a week in the office or two makes no measurable difference to their level of loneliness. Physical presence is not the same as connection. What matters more is how intentionally the organization designs for connection regardless of where people sit. For organizations with remote or hybrid workforces, that means building social structure into distributed work rather than assuming it will emerge on its own.

Supporting EAP Programs for Employees Who Need More

Workplace culture initiatives can reduce isolation and create conditions where connection is more likely to form. For some employees, that is enough. For others, by the time loneliness surfaces as a recognizable problem, it has already begun to affect mental health in ways that require more than a better-structured team meeting. 

An Employee Assistance Program gives employees a confidential, low-barrier path to professional support. For male employees unlikely to initiate a conversation about how they are feeling, a resource that does not require public self-identification as struggling can make a meaningful difference. 

Promoting EAP awareness consistently, rather than only in the wake of a visible incident, normalizes access and increases the likelihood that employees reach out before disconnection becomes something harder to reverse.

How Ulliance Supports Employee Connection and Well-being

Ulliance partners with organizations to support the emotional, mental, and professional health of their employees. Through the Ulliance EAP, employees have access to confidential counseling, life coaching, and work/life support, available at any point, not only in crisis.

Ulliance also supports the organizational side of the equation. Management consultation services help HR leaders and managers recognize the signs of employee disconnection and respond effectively before disengagement becomes turnover. 

For employees navigating loneliness or the stress that accumulates when connection is absent, support is available. For the organizations that employ them, so is guidance on building workplaces where that support is less frequently needed.

FAQS: Male Loneliness at Work

What is workplace loneliness? 
Workplace loneliness is the subjective experience of feeling socially disconnected from colleagues, even when surrounded by other people at work. It differs from simply being alone. An employee can work in a full office and still feel profoundly isolated if their interactions lack depth, trust, or genuine connection. Research consistently links workplace loneliness to reduced performance, higher absenteeism, and increased turnover.

Why are men more likely to experience social isolation at work? 
Men are not necessarily lonelier than women at work, but they are less likely to recognize or disclose it when they are. Research from the Survey Center on American Life shows that male friendship networks have contracted sharply over the past 30 years, leaving many men with fewer sources of social support outside work. When workplace connection is also absent, there may be no remaining outlet. Cultural norms around stoicism and self-reliance mean that isolation tends to manifest as disengagement rather than a request for help.

How can HR do to reduce loneliness among male employees ? 
The U.S. Surgeon General’s 2023 advisory recommends that employers make social connection a strategic priority, train managers to actively support workplace relationships, and create policies that protect employees’ time for connection both inside and outside of work. Research from Harvard Business Review found that manager behavior is the single strongest predictor of whether lonely employees feel supported. Small, consistent actions, including check-ins that go beyond project status, structured social opportunities, and visible leadership support for well-being, make a measurable difference.

What is the difference between being alone at work and feeling lonely at work  ?
Being alone refers to physical solitude, working independently, remotely, or without colleagues nearby. Feeling lonely at work is an emotional state that can occur regardless of physical proximity. Employees in open offices, on active teams, or in daily meetings can still experience profound disconnection if their interactions lack meaning or trust. This distinction matters for HR because solutions focused purely on bringing people together physically, such as return-to-office mandates, do not reliably reduce loneliness.

How does an EAP help employees dealing with loneliness or social disconnection?
An Employee Assistance Program provides confidential, professional support for employees navigating loneliness, stress, anxiety, or depression, including the mental health consequences that can develop when social disconnection goes unaddressed. For employees who would not seek help through visible internal channels, an EAP offers a private first step. Services typically include short-term counseling, life coaching, and referrals to longer-term care when needed. EAP access is most effective when HR promotes it consistently, not only in response to a crisis.

When you partner with Ulliance, our Life Advisor Consultants are always just a phone call away to teach ways to enhance your work/life balance and increase your happiness. The Ulliance Life Advisor Employee Assistance Program can help employees and employers come closer to a state of total well-being.

Investing in the right EAP or Wellness Program to support your employees will help them and help you.  Visit https://ulliance.com/ or call 866-648-8326.

The Ulliance Employee Assistance Program can address the
following issues:
• Stress about work or job performance
• Crisis in the workplace
• Conflict resolution at work or in one’s personal life
• Marital or relationship problems
• Child or elder care concerns
• Financial worries
• Mental health problems
• Alcohol/substance abuse
• Grief
• Interpersonal conflicts
• AND MORE!

References:

1 in 5 Employees Worldwide Feel Lonely; Gallup; Ryan Pendell
https://www.gallup.com/workplace/645566/employees-worldwide-feel-lonely.aspx 

Improving Employee Health by Combatting Loneliness in the Workplace; Harvard Medical School
https://learn.hms.harvard.edu/insights/all-insights/improving-employee-health-combatting-loneliness-workplace 

Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation; U.S. Department of Health and Human Services / Office of the Surgeon General
https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf 

The State of American Friendship: Change, Challenges, and Loss; Survey Center on American Life; Daniel A. Cox
https://www.americansurveycenter.org/research/the-state-of-american-friendship-change-challenges-and-loss/ 

We’re Still Lonely at Work; Harvard Business Review; Constance Noonan Hadley and Sarah L. Wright
https://hbr.org/2024/11/were-still-lonely-at-work